Oh that demon inside of me. Do you make yourself known? When the switch flips south and light exits the room you attack my thoughts without mercy. Your resolve and will is ideal. You drive your ambitions deep into my soul. And there I am, the monster within playing around inside me like a wrecking ball. You exist in all of my doubt about life and tear me apart the more I try and run from you.
But I will fight no longer, only to warmly embrace your presence. Does this confuse you? Does this make you weep at the thought of the grip you once had that exists no longer? You held onto me so perfect and so tight due to my incapability to see that it was the battle that created your strength. Like quicksand I sunk the more I moved. But like I said before, I embrace the darkness now.
Things have changed. I can see well now that darkness can deliver light. There isn't any fear in this heart anymore in regards to you showing up. Why? Because... you are here...right here inside me. Not walled out from me any longer. Not pushed away. Just here with me. Present. Really present.
I really am finally aware of what you really are and who you turned me into. I am not attempting to fool any person any longer by showing them a smile on my face. No, I'll just be myself. So I tip my cap to you to all those times you cut me down. Now, let's take a hike and work this thing out. I'd like to hear what you would like to say about all the years of the past. How proud are you? How much fun did you have? Are you pleased with your achievements? Maybe... I will even clap to your success?
But we are moving on and this is the start of a long relationship. It's going to be difficult, but I'm going to start chatting with you for the first time. But now, my life choices are based primarily on light. It is time to begin living my life and make the best calls I possibly can. But I'm aware that I must talk with you...oh devil within. You can show me a path that absolutely is worth exploring in of its own. You can show me places I've always been scared to go. But to ignore you further would be out of ignorance. Shame. Fear.
So let's go for a walk. I want to hear what you've got to say.
But I will fight no longer, only to warmly embrace your presence. Does this confuse you? Does this make you weep at the thought of the grip you once had that exists no longer? You held onto me so perfect and so tight due to my incapability to see that it was the battle that created your strength. Like quicksand I sunk the more I moved. But like I said before, I embrace the darkness now.
Things have changed. I can see well now that darkness can deliver light. There isn't any fear in this heart anymore in regards to you showing up. Why? Because... you are here...right here inside me. Not walled out from me any longer. Not pushed away. Just here with me. Present. Really present.
I really am finally aware of what you really are and who you turned me into. I am not attempting to fool any person any longer by showing them a smile on my face. No, I'll just be myself. So I tip my cap to you to all those times you cut me down. Now, let's take a hike and work this thing out. I'd like to hear what you would like to say about all the years of the past. How proud are you? How much fun did you have? Are you pleased with your achievements? Maybe... I will even clap to your success?
But we are moving on and this is the start of a long relationship. It's going to be difficult, but I'm going to start chatting with you for the first time. But now, my life choices are based primarily on light. It is time to begin living my life and make the best calls I possibly can. But I'm aware that I must talk with you...oh devil within. You can show me a path that absolutely is worth exploring in of its own. You can show me places I've always been scared to go. But to ignore you further would be out of ignorance. Shame. Fear.
So let's go for a walk. I want to hear what you've got to say.
About the Author:
Evan Sanders is the author of The Words Of Encouragement a website dedicated to spreading encouraging words to everyone who visits and giving them a reason to continue chasing after their dreams. If you are stuck in a rough place, perhaps dealing with that devil within right now, please read these quotes about depression. They will help. A lot.
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